A Badger in Germany got so drunk on overripe (and thus alcoholic) cherries that it stumbled into the middle of the road and refused to budge. A motorist called police near the town of Goslar to report a dead Badger, only for officers to arrive and find the animal alive, but drunk.
Officers eventually chased the animal from the road with a broom.
Good thing he was more of a sleepy drunk than a fighty drunk...I'd be quite pissed if I was trying to sleep one off and some mall cop with a broom whacked me in the ass.
I think we should all be proud of this animal..he's really living up to the reputation we all carry as Badgers.
Makes me feel better about the swigs of warm Margarita mix I took a few weeks ago to catch a buzz when I had unforgivably run out of beer. At least I didn't resort to the overripe cherries.
Elsewhere, a Wolverine was found with a slight caffeine high after wandering into a Dunkin' Donuts dumpster in search of a rat with whom he had hoped to lose his virginity. The 36-year old Wolverine was unsuccessful in his mating attempts and currently spends his days wandering Michigan in search of returnable aluminum cans and someone to listen to his stories about that one time you could actually hear the crowd in Michigan Stadium.